Integrity is the most important of the four pillars on which authentic, long-lasting confidence is built. Integrity in this sense isn’t referring to one’s moral code or how honest you are. Plenty of immoral people have confidence, after all.
It’s referring to internal integrity -which is being whole, authentic, and at peace with one’s self.
If you want to have a solid foundation of confidence, you must be internally consistent and healthy. This means you have to like yourself, accept yourself (both abilities and flaws), and work to improve yourself regularly.
Over time, this sort of integrity builds a form of confidence that can’t be shaken or rattled. Knowing who and what you are -and accepting it -is the most important key to developing a permanent and unbreakable sense of confidence.
Unfortunately, this is something that many people struggle with in today’s world. We are constantly bombarded with messages telling us that we’re not good enough, successful enough, thin enough, or fill-in-the-blank enough. Add to this messages received in childhood and from friends and family, and it’s no wonder many people have self-acceptance issues.
So, how do you work on your integrity to build confidence? Start by working to accept yourself for who you are -which is a totally unique human being. There’s nothing wrong with you and you don’t have to change yourself to make other people like you. Just worry about liking yourself!
You can try many different strategies for accepting yourself. Use affirmations. Journaling helps a lot of people. Self-help books and courses on accepting yourself can help too. Consider therapy if you find your issues to be deeply rooted.
Accepting yourself can take time. Some people find that it takes years. Be gentle with yourself and don’t rush the process. You’ll get there as long as you don’t give up.
Once you’ve accepted yourself, work on liking yourself. There’s no reason to dislike who and what you are! Learn to acknowledge and understand yourself and all of your attributes, both good and bad. That doesn’t mean you let your flaws sit undisturbed; quite the contrary.
This brings us to the final part of integrity -self-improvement. Having integrity means you work to make yourself a better person throughout your life. You work to improve your skills, heal your wounds, and minimize your flaws.
Once you’ve mastered this pillar, you’ll be well on your way to developing authentic confidence.