People cast blame on others because they think it solves problems. If someone is at fault, then the responsibility lies with them to make things right. This is unfair because, generally speaking, one person does not entirely hold the lion’s share of blame. Outside of specific times when someone is clearly at fault, most disagreements or delicate situations have diffused responsibility, and finding healthy resolution is preferable to blaming.
Blaming others won’t solve problems, it makes new ones. Here’s why . . .
Blaming others creates division – Just because you assign blame to someone doesn’t mean they will accept it. Chances are, the person being blamed is blaming someone else and so on and so on. The act of blaming is like tossing a hot potato.
Blaming others alienates people – Solving problems requires teamwork. Blame alienates people and creates an us and them situation. That can make it impossible to get in there and do what needs to be done to move through a problem.
Blaming other people won’t solve problems but there are habits you can create, instead of blaming, that will. Develop these habits and stop blaming others when things go wrong.
Problem-Solving Habit #1 – Seek to understand. Instead of looking for someone to blame, seek to better understand the whole picture. Even if one person is directly responsible for a problem, chances are there is more to it than meets the eye. Seek to understand what’s going on so you can focus on solving the problem rather than casting blame.
Problem-Solving Habit #2 – Ask open-ended questions. Instead of blaming and alienating people, ask a LOT of questions. Seek to put all the pieces together to get a bigger perspective about what’s going on. This can help you discover the nuances of a situation which help with problem solving.
Problem-Solving Habit #3 – Be intentional about solving problems. Taking ownership to help sort things out stops the blame game. When your efforts go into finding solutions there isn’t time to blame others and walk away. Making it a habit to be a part of the solution rather than contributing to the negativity of a problem makes good sense.
Blaming other people when things go wrong won’t do much to solve any problems. It can actually amplify them. What will help is developing habits that help solve problems regardless of fault. Being able to be part of the solution makes solving any problem easier.