Being let down is a crappy thing. From feeling sad and losing trust, to needing to forgive
and move on, the domino effect is a drag. One of the biggest threats of being let down
is resentment – especially if the disappointment comes from someone close to you.
Disappointments are going to happen, even from people you love. Being able to avoid
resentment is important for maintaining relationships and moving forward after being let
down. Let’s look at what can be done to avoid resentment when someone lets you
There are some universal truths that help people avoid feeling resentment:
Truth #1. Most people operate in good faith. Chances are, the person who disappointed
you did not intend to. Being able to consider this truth can help ease the sting of
Truth #2. Many disappointments come from miscommunication or crisscrossed
expectations. You can avoid resentments from being disappointed by changing
communication styles or clarifying needs in the future.
Truth #3. People who cause disappointment often feel sorry and want to make amends.
Allowing others to make things right can prevent resentment.
Working with these truths in mind, take these actions when you start to feel resentment
after being disappointed:
Step #1. Take a deep breath- If you are disappointed, stop for a moment and asses
what happened. Get past the feelings that well up from being let down and ask yourself
if there was intent. If not, take a moment to move past the initial feelings and look at
how to undo the disappointment or have a conversation with the other person to seek
Step #2. Improve communication- If your disappointment is due to
miscommunication, remedy the situation by making improvements. There are many
ways to better communicate and ensure things don’t slip through the cracks or start
patterns that cause resentment.
Step #3. Offer forgiveness- If you want to avoid resentment, offer some grace and
forgiveness. If the offending party is sorry, it’s pretty easy to forgive and move on. You’ll
feel better if you set up new guidelines or take protective measures to make sure things
don’t go haywire again.
Resentment is a natural byproduct of disappointment. It can really add to the sting of
being let down. You can avoid this natural reaction through intentional thought
processes and acting quickly before resentment sets in.